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  • Deja Nycole

The Fragility Of Life

I have much gratitude. it's so astounding, how we become a being, alive in this world to do what we can to make it a better place. [there is] a Jewish philosophy, called Tikkun slam, it means to "repair the world." in other words, we are indoctrinated with that purpose in life, to make the world a better place. I like repairing the world, if I can. in any small way I can.

-Barbra Streisand interview with Rachel Martin, National Public Radio 11/18/22


Imagine, one day, you're on the steps of the United States Supreme Court photo assisting for a magazine shoot and the following week you're admitting yourself to the emergency room. Life is unexpected.


A bacteria infection in my throat entered into my blood stream, causing multiple other internal infections, where my body entered septic shock, which ultimately placed me in the ICU. Sepsis is the body's extreme response to an infection. It is a life-threatening medical emergency. Sepsis happens when an infection you already have triggers a chain reaction throughout your body; a widespread infection causing organ failure and dangerously low blood pressure.


My experience in the Adventist Medical system in Maryland was truly alarming. I am grateful to still be alive to continue writing my story. I am appreciative to the nurses and doctors who took their time to examine me with diligence and the care I deserve to ensure I got on the road to good health, recovery, and understood my diagnosis.


Today, I see the world differently. After being in the hospital for one week, the value of the fragility of life weighs much heavier. Things I once thought were important are now but a flicker in the distance and the importance of life reigns supreme.


My life is important.


I have not been out of the hospital a full 24 hours and I am still trying to wrap my head around the fact that had I waited a day or two longer to get seen at the hospital, I may not still be here today. One of my line sisters told me I wasn't being dramatic enough with the severity of my situation. That fact is scary. It seems so surreal. My life moves so fast that I rarely slow down to see and take in everything happening around me. This is my time to do that.


I know God has a great plan for me and He's not done with me yet. I need to prioritize Him first because He gave me a second chance at life, another opportunity to put Him first on the throne of my heart. He has work for me to do and I need to focus on Him and be resting in Him in order to complete the tasks He's going to give me.


The prayers and support of my family, friends, loved-ones, and my Washingtonian and The Fearless Artist families removed the veil for me to see how much I am truly loved and supported. Sometimes, it is hard to remember who is in our corner when everything is going alright. This challenging time has shown me the various ways in which my life matters and how far and wide my life has impacted the lives of others.


After speaking with a friend today and catching her up to speed on everything that had happened to me in a week's time, she told me her life would never be the same without me, that I make her life better. Like Barbara said, I am here to repair the world, to make the world a better place, if I can, even if just a little... I believe that.


Life is fragile. Life is heavy. Life is scary. Life is uncertain.


AND


My life is beautiful. My life is powerful. My life is intricate. My life repairs. My life has meaning. My life is valuable.


Our lives are more than just moments in the lives of others. Our very presence can shift the trajectory of history, altering lives and timeliness, no matter how big or small. I'm so grateful for another chance and I'm going to rest well so I can continue to live well, slow down, and continue to positively impact the lives of others.



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